


Trust

by MiriamMT



Series: Gallavich OneShots (no smut) [19]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: 3x06, Cheating, Confessions, Crying, Fights, Jealous Ian Gallagher, M/M, Men Crying, Talking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-13
Updated: 2019-12-13
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:08:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21722737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiriamMT/pseuds/MiriamMT
Summary: Ian and Mickey have a fight and Ian thinks, Mickey cheated on him. Mickey finds out, Ian doesn't trust him and throws him out of the house, so Ian and Lip get drunk and talk to Kev, who was with Mickey the night before, that Ian thought Mickey cheated on him.
Relationships: Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich
Series: Gallavich OneShots (no smut) [19]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1525730
Comments: 4
Kudos: 111





	Trust

They had a fight.  
Again.  
In the last time it felt like they didn't really do much else than fighting.  
But they both knew, that in the end, they're gonna be okay.  
They almost never fought, always talked about things, laughed, had no problems and everything worked out great. 

But there were those times both were stressed and one fight after the other came along for weeks.  
They hated it, but they also couldn't do anything against it... they just pushed each other until someone freaked out. Almost every day. 

When those "hard times" ended they usually just sat next to each other on the couch, exhausted. Then they apologised for several minutes, accepting and admitting both their mistakes and flaws and promised each other unconditional love.  
Then they fucked. 

So even though they knew, that those stressed times were coming eventually and that them fighting wasn't so much on them and their relationship but more on the stress and pressure that came from the outside, threating their luck, they fell for it every time and screamed at each other, were aggressive and threw things, insulted each other and sometimes, when it got really fucking messy, they got physical. But getting into a fist fight instead of talking it out was something they really rarely did, it was a leftover from their youth and their upbringings, Mickey never learned to show his emotions or have arguments without violence. Ian taught him. 

Right now, it was bad, really bad. The fighting time went into its fifth week and Mickey couldn't stand it anymore.  
He was waking up alone in his bed and really, there wasn't much Mickey hated more than waking up without his boyfriend.  
He got up and groggily walked into the kitchen. 

"Where were you last night?", a cold voice asked him from the kitchen table.  
"That your way of saying good morning to your boyfriend today?", Mickey asked just as coldly.  
"I asked, where were you last night?"  
Mickey shrugged.  
"When I left, I said, I'll go to the Alibi, so fucking guess where I was!" 

Ian got up from his chair, looking at him angrily.  
"Until fucking 3 am?"  
"Yeah! Why not? I don't have a damn curfew!"  
Ian got closer to him and stared him in the eye.  
"Are you cheating on me?", he asked. 

Mickey's whole body language changed at that.  
This was a new one... Ian thought Mickey cheated? 

They'd usually work themselves up over toast and open peanut butter glasses or who ate whose leftovers. They fought over who's turn it was to put on the dishwasher, to do the laundry or who could decide over the TV program. 

They fought about why Mickey wasn't willing too meet up with Ian's family or Ian's friends and why Ian had to work so long. They fought over Ian's medication, over Mickey's drinking and the smoking and sometimes, when it got really bad, they would bring up old fights like Mickey marrying a whore – usually that was the last straw where Ian knew he had gone too far.  
But this was new. 

"Am I what?"  
"Are you fucking cheating on me, Mick?", Ian yelled.  
Mickey just looked up at him in shock. How could he fucking ask something like this?  
"Are you out of your mind?", he whispered, "How can you ask... how can you even think something like this?" 

"Why the fuck not? You were out until three a.m.! And you got drunk, how should I know what you do all night if you're not fucking here?", Ian kept yelling.  
Mickey bit his lip nodding in acceptance, he looked away for a moment, brushing his knuckles against his nose and looking back at him then.  
"You don't trust me. That's what you want to tell me?" 

Ian seemed to notice at that, that he overstepped a line here. He took a step back and looked at Mickey, thinking about his next words.  
"You don't trust your boyfriend of roughly ten years?"  
Ian blinked a few times.  
"I guess not"  
Mickey shook his head and leaned back on the kitchen counter.  
"What did I ever do so you don't trust me anymore?" 

Ian scoffed.  
"What did you do? Did you ever gave me any reason to trust you?"  
"Did I ever give you any reason not to trust me? Or, ask the other way round, did you ever gave me reason not to trust you?", Mickey rubbed his palms over his face, "I'm tired of this"  
"Tired of what?"  
"Of this!", Mickey yelled at him, "All of this! All this fucking fighting every goddamn day! What is this shit, Ian? What the fuck, seriously! I'm fucking tired of fighting with you over shit, and waking up alone and all this – and now, you think I fucking cheated on you? Are you out of your mind?" 

Ian flinched away from Mickey.  
"Alright, alright, you didn't cheat then, I believe you. I'm so-"  
"Don't you fucking dare to say, you're sorry! I'm tired of you being fucking sorry! All this fighting all those arguments, we always can rely on our relationship to be strong enough to get through hard times, you said so yourself! And now, you're saying you don't fucking trust me? You? Out of all people?", Mickey screamed at his boyfriend so loudly, that Ian was sure the neighbours could hear every word. 

"What's that supposed to mean?"  
"It means I want you out of this fucking house", he said calmer now.  
Both stood in silence for a moment. 

"You... You want me to go?"  
"What use has you staying here, if you don't trust me being away for one night?", he asked, breathing heavily, "Go. And fucking think about trust. You can come fucking back, when you can tell me, what I did to not deserve your trust. Or not at all, I don't even care right now" 

Mickey walked past his boyfriend, making sure to not touch him and disappeared in his bedroom.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Ian opened the door to the Gallagher house.  
He desperately hoped no one would be in, but of course the whole fucking lot sat in the living room and stared at him when he came in. 

"Ian? What are you doing here?", Lip asked.  
Fiona noticed the look on his face, "Are you okay, sweetie? Did you and Mickey fight?"  
Ian swallowed and tears filled his eyes.  
"He told me to leave", he mumbled, and a tear rolled down his freckled cheek. 

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry", Fiona got up and hugged him.  
"I thought you and him just have those times in the year when it get's messy but everything works out in the end", Lip stated, "Doesn't look like it now."  
"No, this was different. I... I think we broke up", Ian full on cried right now. 

After a while Ian went up to his old room and lay in his bed, staring at a wall.  
He lay there for hours thinking about Mickey and him sleeping together in this small ass bed. 

"Hey, yo, Ian", Lip entered the room.  
"How about, we, uh, go down to the Alibi, have some drinks, you tell me and Kev what happened, and we all be angry at Mickey?" 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Ian and Lip sat at the bar, Kevin poured them a few shots and beer.  
"So, what was it this time?", Lip asked, "Did you forget to put on the dishwasher, or did he not want to do the laundry or what?"  
"I'm glad that my relationship going to shit is so funny to you"  
"Oh come on, Ian!", Lip padded his shoulder, "You know, you can always do better than Mickey Milkovich" 

Ian rolled his eyes.  
"You had another fight?", Kevin asked, "With Mickey?"  
Ian nodded and sighed.  
"That's odd. Yesterday he sat here and got drunk mulling over you and mumbling shit about how much he loves your dumb ass."  
"And today, he apparently told him to leave", Lip informed him. 

"Kev, until when did he sat here?"  
Kevin shrugged. "When I wanted to close up, he was in the middle of a meltdown, so we stayed a little longer and I let him babble about you for another hour... I'd say until around three?"  
Ian sighed, "God, I'm such a bad boyfriend"  
"I'd agree if the stuff, Mickey told me, is true, no offence" 

Ian took his third shot and motioned Kevin to refill.  
"I accused him of cheating this morning"  
"Oh", Kevin hissed, "Really? Mickey? You think he could do that? Did he ever do that?"  
"No", Ian shrugged, "Not that I know off" 

"Come on, think harder. What about when he fucked Angie Zahgo?", Lip remined him.  
"You mean when we weren't a couple yet and I also fucked my sister's boyfriend's dad? Yeah, not a good example"  
Lip agreed and took a gulp from his beer. 

"Back to the topic, why exactly did he throw you out?"  
"Because I don't trust him", Ian shrugged, "I mean, is that a reason to break up?"  
Both men looked at him for a few seconds before nodding simultaneously, "Yeah, and a pretty good one" 

"However, he asked me if he ever gave me a reason not to trust him"  
"Sure he gave you plenty!", Lip interrupted  
"As if I ever gave him reason to not trust me! Can you imagine? Like what on earth did I do?" 

Lip and Kevin looked at each other.  
"What?", Ian asked.  
"Well- ", Lip started but Kevin interrupted him.  
"No, Lip, you're only against Mickey anyways. Ian, I like you and I like Mickey. And you're the best couple in this whole fucking neighbourhood – you stole that title from V and me, but we're right behind you and one day we're getting the crown back – but not my point! I'm afraid you have to think about that on your own. Like, really think about it – what he did, what you did. Because without trust... your relationship is doomed anyways..." 

"Wow, thanks Kev. Now I'm feeling way better"  
"You're not supposed to feel better or good, you're close to losing Mickey! I'm not sure if you actually understood that yet!"

Lip put is empty beer glass in front of Kevin.  
"What did he say yesterday anyways?", he asked, "If he was here until three, I'm sure he had plenty to say" 

Kev rolled his eyes.  
"This and that. He always changed from mumbling over how much he loves you to a new reason to be angry at you and back. The whole night. By the way, he doesn't like morning sex because he wants to take a shower and be all clean and fresh before you bang him, but he likes the morning blowjobs and you give really fucking amazing morning blowjobs", Kev shook his head while Lip chuckled and Ian looked down at his glass, "But mostly it was really emotional shit" 

"Mickey can be emotional?", Lip chuckled, "Yeah, right!"  
"Stop always going against him!", Ian defended his boyfriend, "He can be very emotional and... cute... adorable...", Ian chucked down another shot and motioned Kev to fill up, he felt the alcohol buzzing through his head, warming his stomach, "He says the sweetest things when we're alone." 

"Yesterday, he said, you're beautiful and that he never felt beautiful or good, or anything positive until you came into his life and showed him that he is worthy of love and all that.", Kevin told him, "Then he went on about how annoying you can be when girls are flirting with you at work and you take it out on him – and not in a good way" 

Ian sighed, "I love him"  
"And he loves you, trust me. You have those times where you fight only like twice a year but right now it's really hard on Mickey. He hates the fighting and he hates not being able to talk to you and do couple things" 

"Mickey Milkovich does couple things?", Lip asked, "Hard to believe."  
"You're like those fucking tiny angel and devil things on my shoulders", Ian complained, "Let me think, alright?" 

"What is there to think about? If you say, you don't trust him, you don't trust him. Simple as that"  
"No, I just... I don't even know why I accused him of cheating... he wouldn't. Maybe... Maybe I just projected my own insecurities on him, you know?" 

The two men looked at Ian who hid his face in his arms.  
"What do you mean?", Kevin asked and poured himself a shot, "Did you... Ian, did you cheat on Mick?" 

Ian bit his lip and avoided to look the bartender in the face.  
"You cheated on him? On Mickey? Who would literally do everything for you? And you don't trust him?", Kevin exclaimed.  
"I... it was years ago, alright? When I was manic and hypersexual all the time... I... I jerked this guy off behind a store, got a blowjob from one of the waiters at Patsy's, I did a Porno and I blew those guys to get money when I ran away with Yevy... I'm such an asshole." 

Kevin took the glass away from Ian.  
"You don't get another drink. So, you cheated on Mickey and now you're afraid he'd do the same?" 

Ian shook his head.  
"He wouldn't... he would never. I'm... I'm afraid I'd do it again. What if the fucking mania sets in again and I cheat on him and lose him? I... I don't deserve him and I just... I wish he would be as flawed as me, I wish he would do mistakes like I do so I wouldn't feel as shitty... Even all the fighting, it's my fault! I'm fucking stressed at work and stressed by my co-workers and everything and I let it out on him! I'm such a mess!" 

Ian pressed his lips together and held his head low, a tear falling on the bar.  
"Ian, Mickey is just a flawed as you, if not even more... he would beat everyone up who just looks at him the wrong way, he never had a legal job, sold drugs since the eighth grade, he married Svetlana and beat you up, you remember that? You lost a fucking tooth!", Lip exclaimed. 

Kevin raised his eyebrows.  
"Yeah, both of you have your rough edges and did mistakes"  
But Ian's mind was at the beat up Mickey gave him when he confronted him about his marriage. What he said and how he behaved under the circumstances. 

"I'm an idiot"  
"No, you're not", Lip rubbed his back.  
"Tell me more about the stuff Mickey said last night, Kev", he mumbled. 

"He said, you're perfect. That he doesn't care about your bipolar or about your annoying family. That not even the fighting would keep him away, not even you running away again and again kept him away. You could start the damn apocalypse and he would still love you. That's what he said, he was completely hammered and complained about you making him watch Supernatural. He said that the reason he would always come back and always stay, is that there just isn't another person for him, there will never be anyone else for him but you." 

Lip raised his eyebrows; never would he had thought someone would say that about another person let alone Mickey saying it. 

"You know what, you were right", Lip said to Ian, "You are an idiot"  
"You have no idea, I'm the fucking worst boyfriend in history!"  
"No, you're not", Kevin reassured him "Remember how Lip treated Mandy?" 

Lip just flipped him off.  
"There is another thing", Kevin remembered, "He said, he would marry you, if he knew if you'd want that."

"I need to get home", Ian said suddenly and got up, stumbling slightly, the meds made him drunk pretty quickly and pretty heavily "I need to talk to Mickey, I need to apologize" 

"No, fuck Ian, not when you're drunk like that"  
"Now, I need to talk to him, now!"  
Ian had already almost made it to the door.  
"He'll be mad at you because you got drunk on Lithium!", Kevin yelled and made him stop, "Talk to him tomorrow" 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Mickey woke up alone.  
Again.  
He rolled around in bed for an hour until he finally got up to take a shower. 

He walked into the kitchen to see his son sitting there and having breakfast.  
"Hey, Yevy, no school?"  
"It's Saturday", he explained.  
"Right", he sat down next to him. 

Mickey took a deep breath.  
"I love you kid", he mumbled, "I'm sorry it's kinda messy here right now"  
Yevgeny nodded "It's okay, pops.", he chewed his cereal, "Why didn't dad come home last night? Did you break up now?" 

Mickey sighed, he didn't have an answer for his son, and he hated it.  
"I don't want you to break up. I don't want any of you to go and leave me, not dad and not you, pops" 

"I don't want to break up either, Yevy. But you shouldn't worry about that, buddy, Ian's always gonna be your dad, no matter what, alright?"  
Yevy nodded. 

Someone knocked on the door.  
"That's Aunt Debbie, she wanted to get me so I can play with Franny", Yevy grinned and got up but stopped after a few steps and turned back around to put his breakfast away.  
"It's okay, I put it away, go answer the door." 

After a minute Mickey followed Yevy to see his son hugging Ian.  
"Daddy, you're back", he squealed.  
"I was only gone for a day, Yevy, no worries"  
Debbie stood behind him and after a moment Yevy was already gone and on his way to his play date with Franny. 

Ian looked at Mickey for a moment.  
They stood a few feet apart and looked at each other.  
"Can I hug you?", Ian asked eventually.  
Mickey nodded. 

Ian made big steps and within a second had his arms wrapped around the Milkovich.  
Mickey leaned against the ginger and took in his scent and his warmth. He had missed him last night. Not waking up next to him was horrible enough, but being alone the whole night? He couldn't stand it. 

"You got drunk", he mumbled eventually.  
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, for everything", he had tears in his eyes, "I do trust you, Mickey, I know you never gave me a reason to not trust you, I was so stupid for saying-"  
"I know, it's okay, it's okay Ian"  
"It's not", Ian said and took a step back, "There are things that you don't know... that I need to tell you" 

Mickey bit his bottom lip and looked at him worriedly.  
Ian sat down on the couch and Mickey sat down next to him. 

"What is it?", Mickey asked.  
"I... I cheated on you", he said hesitantly, he looked to the ground, too ashamed to look at Mickey right now.  
Mickey couldn't even answer, he just stared at his boyfriend, shocked. 

"It was years ago... when I was manic, you know, after being depressed for the first time?"  
"You mean the porno?", Mickey wanted to be relieved. He already knew about the porn and even if there was more, it was while Ian was manic, he didn't have control over it. 

"No... there were other times"  
Mickey licked over his lips "You cheated on me more than once?", he whispered.  
Tears fell from Ian's face.  
"I'm sorry... when I... when I went to the store with Yevy and Liam once, you had this moving truck scam going on at the time, at the store was a guy, also with a child. I don't know, Mick, I was hypersexual and manic, I couldn't think straight, I'm so sorry" 

Mickey didn't respond. He just sat there completely frozen in his spot. 

"The other time was... I don't know, a waiter blew me on the toilette in Fiona's diner. I'm really sorry Mickey, I'm also sorry that I never told you. I didn't have control over it and I... I would never do that again, I'm sorry, I lov- " 

"Stop", Mickey whispered "Don't, don't say that right now"  
Ian looked at him, pain in his eyes.  
"It's one thing that you cheated on me, Ian. It was years ago, you were manic, and I know, that you didn't have any control over it back then. I'm fucking mad though, like when you ran away with Yev, same thing.", he swallowed, "But you cheated on me... while you were out with our son? You were supposed to take care of him and instead you fucked a guy while our son did what?" 

Ian bit his lip, Mickey's words hurt him, especially when he called Yevgeny "our son".  
"I didn't fuck him, technically, I jerked him off. Yevy was in his stroller, faced away"  
"Oh! oh you just jerked a random guy off while you turned away from our kid, then it's okay!", he yelled and got up from the couch. 

"Mickey wait, I'm sorry", he ran after him "Mick!"  
Mickey stopped and turned around.  
"You thought I was cheating on you! You don't trust me, and I would trust you with my life and yet you're the one...", he screamed and rubbed his hand over his face, stopping himself from crying. 

"I'm sorry", he repeated, "I don't know what else to say! I wish I could change it and I wish I wouldn't have said something as horrible as that! I trust you, I know you're the best thing that could ever happen to me and I'm such a fool for putting what we have at risk! And I want to apologize for everything I did wrong and I made so fucking many mistakes I can't even count them all!", he was crying, and he sank to his knees, until he sat on the ground. 

"Since last night... I have to think about... how awful and insensitive I was before you got married. Afterwards I was a prick too", they already have had a huge fight about Ian's behaviour back then, how he didn't respect Mickey's boundaries and forced him to come out, he didn't need to bring it up again. 

"But before... something terrible happened to you and I wasn't there for you", he was on his knees, sitting on the ground crying, "I wasn't there for you when you needed me the most! Instead I joked about the most horrible thing that could ever happen to another person and it happened to the man I loved, and I was... I freaked out about the wedding instead of being there for you while you were the one being forced to marry her. I was mad at you for being forced to marry the woman who did this... horrible thing to you because of your sadistic dad! I said horrible things while you were so hurt... you were so hurt, you couldn't even bear to be touched by me and I kept pushing and saying things... I'm so sorry, I'm so fucking sorry!" 

Mickey stared down at his boyfriend.  
He never saw Ian like this before, completely broken down in a meltdown.  
Mickey didn't know how to handle this. 

He could handle manic Ian.  
He could handle depressed Ian.  
He could handle angry Ian.  
He could handle sad Ian.  
But this was a completely new level. 

He didn't know what to do and in the same moment, he was so overwhelmed by Ian bringing all this old stuff up that he hadn't thought about in years.  
He slowly sat down next to Ian and wrapped his arms around him.  
He just wanted him to stop crying, he just wanted to comfort him. 

Neither said anything, Ian just cried and clung to Mickey, who held him tightly with an empty expression. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

They still sat next to each other, Mickey leaned on the wall and Ian leaned against him, still wrapped up in his arms.  
"I love you", Mickey said after an eternity. 

"How?", Ian breathed, "How could you love this?"  
"I don't know, I just do. I fucking love you, even though you're an idiot sometimes... But most of the time... you're all I need, and you give me everything I need and help me whenever I need your help. You're always there. That's what matters. Not what was six years ago." 

"We never talked about it", Ian mumbled, "Why didn't we ever talk about it?"  
"Because it's not important anymore", Mickey whispered, "Because I don't want to remember it. Because I'm happy with how things are. You, me and our son. I don't need more, and I don't need to think about all the bumps in the road that led us here." 

"I got hammered at the Alibi last night", Ian took Mickey's hand in his "I know, you don't like it when I get drunk while I'm on Lithium. But I talked to Kev and he told me about all the stuff you said to him last night. You always get so emotional when you drink." 

Mickey closed his eyes and leaned his head back, just feeling Ian's hand in his and hearing his boyfriends voice.  
"I love you just as much as you love me and I'm sorry that I always take out my stress on you. I swear, I'll try and work on it. And... I would marry you within a split second if you'd ask me, just so you know... as side note." 

Mickey opened his eyes again.  
"You really can't tell bartenders anything anymore these days"  
"So it was true, that you said that to him?"  
Mickey shrugged. He thought it was odd, that one of their biggest fights and Ian's breakdown led them here suddenly. 

"I love you, and I would love to marry you"  
"That's good, because I already have an engagement ring hidden in the closet and those things are really fucking expensive"  
Ian chuckled at him. 

"Can you forgive me being so damn stupid, the last weeks, especially yesterday, and back then?"  
"Yeah, of course, the thought of you not trusting me hurt, though"  
"I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking. I know, you never did anything that made you untrustworthy. You stayed with me the whole time when I got sick, which means, you're fucking insane", Mickey chuckled, "But I can trust you with my life. I just needed to remember that"  
Mickey nodded "It's okay, freckles", he whispered, and Ian was relieved to hear him being addressed by one of the many nicknames again. It meant everything was okay. 

"So... you gonna show me that engagement ring now?"  
"No", Mickey grinned, "I've got something planned for that. I'm gonna go really sappy fruity gay on you."  
Ian chuckled "You sure? Heard engagement sex was the best"  
"Well, you'll have to wait a bit for that. Also, I'm sure I'm getting some make-up sex first", he whispered and leaned down to kiss Ian.


End file.
